How to Have the Wedding of Your Dreams Without Breaking the Bank

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I have a confession to make: I’ve been obsessed with weddings for as long as I can remember. Seriously, by the time I was 7, I had stacks of bridal magazines, and when that sparkly ring finally landed on my finger, I was a prime target for the $56 billion Wedding Industrial Complex.

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Spoiler alert: the wedding industry isn’t exactly looking out for your financial well-being—or your parents'. According to The Knot, the average cost of a wedding in the U.S. in 2017 was a whopping $33,000—and that’s without including the honeymoon! Yikes! To put that into perspective, that’s a down payment on a house!

You don’t need to be a wedding-obsessed person like me to feel the pressure to overspend. Whether you’re trying to keep things simple or go all out, wedding costs can quickly spiral out of control if you’re not careful. The good news? It doesn’t have to be this way.

Here are my top five financial tips to help you plan the wedding you want—without the stress of overspending or the burden of regret.

 1. Focus on What Matters Most

When it comes to weddings, the list of things you can spend money on seems endless—venue, flowers, invitations, favors, custom entertainment… it goes on and on! But here’s the trick: focus on the three things that are most important to you and your partner.

For my wedding, the top three were food, photography, and music. We wanted to ensure our guests had an amazing meal, that we’d have beautiful photos to remember the day, and that the music would keep everyone dancing all night. We prioritized those three things and cut back on everything else.

For instance, instead of spending a fortune on fancy paper invitations, we went digital. And instead of splurging on extravagant favors, we skipped them entirely (trust me, most guests leave those heart-shaped coasters behind at the reception anyway). By focusing on the things that matter most, you’ll not only cut costs, but you’ll also ensure that the core elements of your day are exactly as you want them to be.

2. Have Honest Conversations About Family Contributions

In 2017, only 10% of couples paid for their weddings entirely on their own. That means for most couples, family members are pitching in to help cover the costs. While this is incredibly generous and can alleviate some financial stress, it also opens the door to potential conflicts—especially when opinions about the wedding differ.

That’s why it’s crucial to have open, honest, and loving conversations with anyone who plans to contribute financially. Set clear boundaries early on, both in terms of how much they’ll contribute and what role they’ll play in decision-making. For example, if Uncle Ted is writing a check, make sure you’re on the same page about whether or not he gets to pick the menu!

Most importantly, make one ironclad promise to yourself and your family: NO DEBT. There’s no need to go into debt for a single day, no matter how special it is. Wedding debt can be a burden that lasts long after the cake is eaten and the dress is packed away.

3. Swear Off Wedding Debt

I can’t stress this enough—**do not go into debt for your wedding**. I’ve worked with so many couples who start their marriage with wedding debt hanging around their necks like a financial ball and chain. In fact, a staggering 74% of couples say they plan to go into debt for wedding costs. But here’s the thing: weddings, as magical as they are, are not an investment like a home or an education.

The International Foundation for Divorce Advocacy reports that 22% of marriages end due to financial stress, often brought on by overspending. So by splurging on a wedding you can’t afford, you may actually be working against the very thing your wedding is supposed to celebrate—your love and future together.

Set a strict budget based on what you can afford, and stick to it. Your future selves will thank you for starting your marriage debt-free!

 4. Take Advantage of Friends’ and Family’s Talents

Believe it or not, you probably have a treasure trove of talented friends and family members who can help with your wedding. Do you know a friend who’s a talented photographer? A cousin who’s great at baking? A sibling who can DJ? Asking for help in lieu of traditional gifts can be a wonderful way to cut costs and honor the talents of the people closest to you.

For example, my uncle is a world-class cellist, and he was more than happy to perform at our ceremony. And instead of hiring an expensive caterer for dessert, we asked a close friend who’s an excellent baker to help with the cake. These personal touches made our day even more special and saved us a significant amount of money.

Just remember that when you rely on favors, it’s important to be respectful. Don’t expect professional-grade work if someone is a hobbyist, and be sure to thank them appropriately for their help!

5. Keep in Mind: Most Details Will Be Forgotten

Here’s a little-known secret: people have short memories. While we all want our wedding to be a day that our guests will remember forever, the truth is, they’re unlikely to recall every detail. Uncle Ted probably won’t remember what he ate for dinner, but he’ll remember whether the food was served on time. Your friends won’t recall what the napkins looked like, but they’ll remember whether they had to pay for their drinks.

Think back to the weddings you’ve attended—what do you remember? Chances are, the moments that stand out had nothing to do with how much the couple spent. Instead, it’s the heartfelt speech from the maid of honor, the look on the groom’s face as his bride walks down the aisle, or the fun of dancing with old friends.

Spending more doesn’t necessarily lead to better memories. In fact, some of the most meaningful moments are entirely free.

Final Thought: Your Wedding Day Is the Start of Something Bigger

While your wedding day is undoubtedly special, it’s important to remember that it’s not the finish line—it’s the starting gate to your future together. The time and money you spend on your wedding should reflect not just your celebration, but your commitment to building a life together.

So go ahead, plan an amazing day, but be sure to keep your eyes on the bigger picture. Investing in your marriage and your future is what truly matters, and that’s where your heart (and wallet) should be focused.

Wishing you a beautiful, budget-friendly wedding filled with love and joy!